October 04, 2023

"Yikes! Ron DeSanctimonious released his fundraising numbers for the past quarter and they are worse than expected—showing he has even less money to spend on the primary than he did the quarter before. On the same day his campaign announced it’s shipping staffers from Tallahassee to Iowa, DeSanctus is going to South Carolina for events—NOT his do-or-die state of Iowa.


If DeSanctus got rid of his campaign manager and fired a third of his team after last quarters’ anemic fundraising numbers, one can only imagine the rampage he will go on after his campaign failed him once again in embarrassing fashion.


DeSanctus has now fallen so low in a recent New Hampshire poll that he’s nine points BEHIND Birdbrain, who is already in distant second place to President Trump.


Team DeSanctus must be second-guessing their life choices at this point."

—Steven Cheung, Trump spokesperson


On August 24, 2023, Always Back Down consultant Jeff Roe gave Ron DeSanctimonious 60 days to "beat Trump."



Now, with just 20 days to go, U-Hauls full of DeSimps can be seen leaving Tallahassee for Des Moines in an attempt to save Ron’s flatlining campaign.

Today, The New York Times unpacked DeSanctus’ embarrassing quarterly financial report, highlighting that Ron's "$15 million sum is less than the $20 million DeSanctus brought in during the previous quarter," with DeSanctimonians admitting that Ron has a measly $5 million on hand.


This only leaves the question, how many staffers does Ron need in Iowa need for him to crawl out of a 30+ point deficit?

In other disastrous news for Ron, USA Today and Suffolk’s latest poll has DeSanctimonious falling to THIRD PLACE in New Hampshire - 9 points behind Birdbrain Nikki Haley - while President Trump sits comfortably at the top with a 30-point lead.


If Ron DeSanctimonious plans on shipping out teams to every state he’s trailing, he is going to need a lot more than $5 million.



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