I'll never stop
Fighting for you!
December 12, 2023
Mar-a-Lago, FL— Today, December 12, is the deadline for Ron DeSanctimonious—who has fallen in the polls like an injured bird—to remove his name from the Florida GOP primary ballot and avoid a humiliating political beat down in his home state.
Just this morning, a new poll shows President Trump dominating DeSanctus in Florida by a whopping 41 points.
As has been the case everywhere, DeSanctus has continued his free fall in Florida, losing 4 points since August in his home state. Meanwhile, President Trump has gained ground in Florida, extending his insurmountable lead to more than double Ron’s total support.
Things only look uglier for Ron nationally. Just last week, Ron hit an all-time low in the Emerson College survey, falling to third place with an embarrassing 6.7% support.
In a recent Morning Consult poll featuring 26 states, Ron does not even come close to leading any of those states. In fact, Ron has dropped to third in several states, and even in Ron’s most favorable state, he still trails President Trump by a massive 32 points.
The little support and money that Ron has left is dwindling away as Ron is in an all-out war with Nikki “Birdbrain” Haley for first-place-loser in Iowa. Ron will be steamrolled in New Hampshire, South Carolina, and Nevada. At this point, it seems that Ron’s advisors will simply refuse to bring themselves and their delusional, high-heeled candidate back to Planet Earth until the campaign checks start bouncing.
Ron has no shot of winning Iowa, no shot of winning Florida, and no shot at winning the nomination. Will DeSanctus remove himself from the ballot in a pitiful attempt to salvage what little dignity remains intact, or will he face the ultimate political humiliation in Florida 64 days after losing the Iowa caucus?